The period of the Omer, the time between Pesach and Shavuos, is a time when we are supposed to be growing and preparing ourselves to receive the Torah. As I mentioned in my previous blog I had been having that normal, back to earth and reality, hard time when I returned from my past trip to Israel, and my Pesach experience really started to help me to get back on the right track again, Baruch Hashem. Anyways, I had been gearing up for Shavuos, and I was very much looking forward to the Chag, mostly because I was going to spend it with a wonderful family, that I have become very close with, in Boro Park. Knowing that I was going to have a true Shavuos experience made me even more excited for the holiday. Although I was a little worried about it being a 3 day Yom Tov due to the fact that it began motzei Shabbos, and I knew that my hair was going to be a complete grease ball, I still had no doubt that this Shavuos would be one for the books.
After arriving in Boro Park a few hours before Shabbos, I was ready to help anyway I could in the kitchen to prepare. I'm really trying to be more domestic and learn how to cook, etc. Although it took me about 40 minutes to chop up 8 cucumbers (I'm not exaggerating) I got the job done and felt like I was being somewhat helpful and contributing to the wonderful meals that we would have over Shabbos and Yom Tov. As Shabbos drew nearer, we continued fervently to finish our work in the kitchen. About 30 minutes prior to candle lighting we finally finished the days work and were able to go get freshened up for Shabbos. After digging through my suitcase I decided on an outfit that I thought would be special enough to welcome the Shabbos Bride. The week prior to Shavuos I spent a good amount of time in Forever 21 shopping for clothes that could be made tniustic and that would be nice for the Chag. I've been working on tnius for a while now, and it is a topic that deserves further discussion at a later time, but basically my clothes are very important to me. I want to give a good name (and face) to Jewish women everywhere. I believe we need to present ourselves in the way that Hashem wants us to be viewed. Therefore, one way I try to do this is by putting a lot of time into my outfits. Anyway, as candle lighting comes each week, I feel a sense of calm. I've really been working on making Shabbos and Yom Tov more meaningful for me for a while, and candle lighting is always a special thing for me. Have you ever watched a woman in her home light candles for her entire family? It is one of the most beautiful things I have ever seen, and it gives me such strength to light my own candles and daven to Hashem that my experience should be as meaningful as theirs. So like in a song I learned this Yom Tov, "The sun is going down, it's shining through the trees", and I was finally there. Nothing to worry about. Just me, Shabbos, and Shavuos for the next three days.
The days went by faster than I thought they'd would. I'll just quickly highlight some of my favorite and most meaningful points of the Chag. Can we PLEASE talk about that Dairy Kiddish??! UNREAL! I don't think it should be legal for someone to consume that amount of dairy unhealthiness in one sitting, and at that, twice in two days! I had to go all in! How couldn't I? From the blintzes to the iced coffee, all I can say is YUM! I davened Yizkor in shul. Although if you are unable to attend shul on the times of the year when the Yizkor service is davened, it is acceptable to daven at home, it was very special for me to daven with the Rebbetzin who I stayed with, in a shul. After lighting the memorial candle the night before, I felt like I was really doing my mother's neshama a great honor by doing this. I also met some of the most amazing people! Family members and friends of the family! Everyone that I met over the Yom Tov left such an impression, and really helped to make my days special. At some of the meals it was just the family and me, and I really felt like part of the family. Those were some of my favorite times. Even though much of the conversation was in Yiddish, where the only words I know now are sha (quiet) and, yeah that's all that comes to mind, I still felt like I was a true part of the table and was really included and welcomed.
Overall, the Yom Tov was amazing. I could not have asked to receive the Torah in a better way. Since Shavuos, I have been reunited with my best friends from my Jewel trip and have been eating all the wonderful hamburgers that NYC has to offer. The wonderful family invited me back to Boro Park to commemorate Shabbos with them this week, and I could not be looking any more forward to it. As my trip to Israel gets closer I feel more and more ready each day thanks to the wonderful people and experiences that I am afforded. As a Ba'alat Teshuva, truly one of the most important factors in our experiences is the people that we meet along the way, and so far, I consider myself to be the luckiest.
Thursday, May 31, 2012
Wednesday, May 16, 2012
In the beginning...
As I sit here trying to figure out exactly how I want this blog to go, I have a few things in mind. I really want to do my journey justice. I want to tell about my ups and downs on my journey back to Hashem, while at the same time shedding a little bit of humor on certain situations because that is just the kind of person that I am. So let me first give you the quick and abbreviated story of how I got to where I am today.
Last May I went on Birthright with Aish HaTorah and my campus Rabbi, Rabbi Seth, who I am sure will be mentioned many more times throughout this blog as he and his wife, Lisa, are two of the biggest reasons I decided to embark on my spiritual journey. As we travelled throughout Israel, the Golan Heights, the Dead Sea, etc it was all really cool, but nothing was really AWESOME until we got to Jerusalem. Now you're thinking, here we go, another one of those "Jerusalem diseased" girls who just can't get enough of the place. Well, if that bothers you, you may want to stop reading because it's true. I LOVE JERUSALEM!! I knew from the moment we drove down the winding roads and "Jerusalem" by Matissyahu was playing on the radio of the bus. Anyway, much more about the place that I truly consider home later. So I come home from Birthright completely frummed out and I haven't touched a boy since...KIDDING. But I did come home with a lot of questions that Rabbi Seth was more than happy to answer. I began learning at the beginning of the school year and my interest completely took off. Throughout my time spent with the Cook family, Shabbas at their home, and the new values about Judaism that I was learning, Orthodox Judaism was becoming more interesting to me, and it felt as though it was calling to me. I really was reconnecting, and it was wonderful. I was fortunate to go on Jewel for Women in December where more clarification happened, and I really decided that this was the path that I would be going on for the rest of my life. Returning to secular Bloomington, Indiana from Jewel was HARD. This was one of those times where our Yetzer Hara really pulls at us. It is easier to forgo davening and to wear whatever we want. I felt guilty about it, but I hoped that Hashem would help me get through this difficult time. Something happened when Pesach rolled around. It is hard to put into words, but I spent the chag with some amazing people and had somewhat of a spiritual rebirth. I was ready to be taken out of Egypt and to be freed from what had been holding me back for the past few months. Going into the period of the Omer I was ready to grow again and to get ready to receive the Torah. Now, with the help of G-d, I am getting ready to go to Israel for the 3rd time in a year; my Dad has let me become an El Al frequent flyer...IT IS AWESOME!
Basically that is the incredibly up to date story of my Jewish life at this point. Sorry if it wasn't as abbreviated as you may have liked. They will not all be like that! Anywhooo, I hope you will follow me on my journey to Eretz Yisrael and EYAHT this summer. I could not be more excited for this next chapter in my life, and I am counting down the days until I can finally turn the page for it to begin.
Last May I went on Birthright with Aish HaTorah and my campus Rabbi, Rabbi Seth, who I am sure will be mentioned many more times throughout this blog as he and his wife, Lisa, are two of the biggest reasons I decided to embark on my spiritual journey. As we travelled throughout Israel, the Golan Heights, the Dead Sea, etc it was all really cool, but nothing was really AWESOME until we got to Jerusalem. Now you're thinking, here we go, another one of those "Jerusalem diseased" girls who just can't get enough of the place. Well, if that bothers you, you may want to stop reading because it's true. I LOVE JERUSALEM!! I knew from the moment we drove down the winding roads and "Jerusalem" by Matissyahu was playing on the radio of the bus. Anyway, much more about the place that I truly consider home later. So I come home from Birthright completely frummed out and I haven't touched a boy since...KIDDING. But I did come home with a lot of questions that Rabbi Seth was more than happy to answer. I began learning at the beginning of the school year and my interest completely took off. Throughout my time spent with the Cook family, Shabbas at their home, and the new values about Judaism that I was learning, Orthodox Judaism was becoming more interesting to me, and it felt as though it was calling to me. I really was reconnecting, and it was wonderful. I was fortunate to go on Jewel for Women in December where more clarification happened, and I really decided that this was the path that I would be going on for the rest of my life. Returning to secular Bloomington, Indiana from Jewel was HARD. This was one of those times where our Yetzer Hara really pulls at us. It is easier to forgo davening and to wear whatever we want. I felt guilty about it, but I hoped that Hashem would help me get through this difficult time. Something happened when Pesach rolled around. It is hard to put into words, but I spent the chag with some amazing people and had somewhat of a spiritual rebirth. I was ready to be taken out of Egypt and to be freed from what had been holding me back for the past few months. Going into the period of the Omer I was ready to grow again and to get ready to receive the Torah. Now, with the help of G-d, I am getting ready to go to Israel for the 3rd time in a year; my Dad has let me become an El Al frequent flyer...IT IS AWESOME!
Basically that is the incredibly up to date story of my Jewish life at this point. Sorry if it wasn't as abbreviated as you may have liked. They will not all be like that! Anywhooo, I hope you will follow me on my journey to Eretz Yisrael and EYAHT this summer. I could not be more excited for this next chapter in my life, and I am counting down the days until I can finally turn the page for it to begin.
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